Mansion Afternoon Tea Coordinate ☕🥞

Hello bats! Very short post for today~ 

A little while ago I went out with my friends for afternoon tea at a historic mansion. I didn't really take any photos of the food because I was too busy eating, haha. Unfortunately, we mistimed our visit, so we ended up having to leave immediately after tea. I've already toured the mansion and it was jam packed with tourists anyway so it wasn't a big loss, but I would have liked to have taken some cursed photos in the basement. After that, I had Japanese curry for dinner with my boyfriend. And then the next morning, I went out for brunch (⭒•͈ 𓎺 •͈ ) I had pancakes, eggs, and fruit salad.

OP: Moi-même-Moitie

Blouse: Angelic Pretty

Headdress: Antique Beast
Socks: Moi-même-Moitie
Accessories: Moi-même-Moitie, Néant Glass
Shoes: Fluevog

 

Until next time...(❁´◡`❁)

[Current Music: Faith and the Muse - Fade and Remain]

2022 in Review...

Hello bats!  /＼ ^.ˍ.^ ／\  Wow, it feels like January suddenly appeared out of nowhere! I can't believe Christmas was already a few weeks ago.

November and December have been super busy for me! Birthdays, holidays, work...actually, I spent most of the Christmas holidays working away, so this is the first time I've been able to just sit down and veg out with no obligations. I still somehow found time to see friends and family, do a bit of shopping, get some new tattoos, and get my hair and nails done. I didn't get to wear lolita a lot, but I'll share some of my coordinates from the past couple of weeks, as well as my thoughts on the year...

Cozy butterfly-motif coordinate for my friend's ILD meetup.

 

 

Bonnet: Triple Fortune
OP: Atelier Pierrot

Blouse: Atelier Pierrot

Corset: Atelier Pierrot
Tights: Royal Princess Alice
Accessories: Moi-même-Moitie, Modifica, Néant Glass

Bag: Moi-même-Moitié
Shoes: Lamoda

2022 has been a bit of a mess. Some of it was my own doing, and some of it was just bad luck. It wasn't a total writeoff; I had some pretty wonderful experiences this year alongside the awful ones. But I try to look at negative experiences as learning opportunities, so this year I learned two extremely valuable lessons. 

The first lesson is a very simple one: mind your business. Why am I wasting my energy on things that don't have any bearing on me and my life? I have learned that life is much more peaceful when I simply...don't. I just don't care anymore.

Removing myself from most social media really helped me realize what a colossal waste of time it is to get up in arms about what literal strangers are saying or doing. I started deleting my social media accounts nearly 2 years ago and don't miss it at all. (❁´◡`❁)

I also had a lot of old school classmates and colleagues following me on my social media - people who I barely interacted with, much less liked. Initially I felt a bit bad about removing them because I thought it might offend them in some way, but I realized that I didn't really owe them the right to keep tabs on my personal life, and that they also probably thought of me as rarely as I thought of them, so they probably wouldn't even notice.

The second lesson is that you need to let go of anything that no longer serves you, even if it hurts or it is difficult. Whether that thing is a person, a place, a social group, a job...it doesn't matter. It's easy to get comfortable in a situation that is toxic or harmful to you, to the point where the idea of walking away is scarier than the idea of being in that situation forever. It's also easy to get complacent and lazy when you're in a comfortable position, even if it's holding you back, just because change is difficult...I've definitely been there before, but I recently watched someone I care about get stuck in this trap and refuse to allow themselves to climb out.

I've walked away from so many things over this past year. I went through a slow and painful (but amicable) breakup with someone who ultimately was not the right person for me. I left people who were not harmful on the surface, but encouraged a negative mindset and toxic behaviours that I wasn't even fully aware of until I took a step back from it all. I miss those people on some level, but I value my growth more. No regrets.

My friend invited me to a fancy hotel for afternoon tea! We went to karaoke after.

  

Headdress: Atelier Pierrot
OP: Victorian Maiden

Blouse: Moi-même-Moitié

Underskirt: Millenoirs

Coat: Atelier Pierrot
Socks: Moi-même-Moitié
Accessories: Néant Glass, Antique Beast
Shoes: Na+H

I have a few simple resolutions for the year, too! I find I'm usually good at sticking to them, but only if they're straightforward and easy to maintain, and if they're something that can be done as an ongoing project so that I can make a habit of them. So...

My first resolution is to continue to clear both my lolita and daily wardrobes. I get weirdly emotionally attached to inanimate objects, especially things with lots of memories attached like clothing. I feel a bit guilty getting rid of clothing that is still in wearable condition, even if I don't wear it anymore. But it needs to be done! I'm out of space...

I also want to get back into art and doll customizing. I have so many doll bases and supplies sitting around that I haven't touched in a long time. I have a lot of big ideas for dolls piling up in a sketchbook collecting dust. It would be so fun to work with my hands again.

My last resolution is to post more regularly in my blog! It is therapeutic and soothing for me. I need to have a place where I can ramble endlessly and people can just click away when they get bored. Otherwise I do it in person and then some poor person is trapped with me while I talk at them (´･_･`)

That's it for now, so cheers to a brighter year and better days ahead, my friends! Wishing you a safe, peaceful, prosperous, and happy New Year ♪:.(◡‿◡✿).:♪

Storytime: I Was an Online Radio DJ!

Hello hello (´｡• ᵕ •｡`) So, this is a bit of a random post. I was going through old image files on my hard drive looking for stuff to make this silly edit of my coord photo and ended up taking a trip down memory lane. I hope you enjoy reading my little early 2000s internet anecdote! This is right around the time I was discovering goth culture and lolita fashion, and was experimenting with wearing different clothes and listening to all kinds of different types of music.

Headdress: GothLoliCloset
JSK: Atelier Pierrot

Blouse: Atelier Pierrot

Cutsew: Moi-même-Moitié
Socks: Moi-même-Moitié
Accessories: Moi-même-Moitié

Bag: La Luice
Boots: Metamorphose

Back in the day when piracy was rampant and streaming services were in their infancy, my friend ran a hugely popular website where you could download thousands of albums, video games, TV shows, movies...you name it. The site had an online streaming radio station. It was never huge - maybe a couple hundred listeners at most, whereas the rest of the site received hundreds of thousands of hits. In the early 2000s there were tons of tiny underground online radio stations for every niche genre imaginable. I still listen to a few (anyone remember Sanctuary Radio?) but most of them are long since defunct. I miss them...the little communities that popped up around these websites were fun and cozy places to be.

I was a DJ on the radio station and a moderator on the website for a while. We had a live chatbox, forum, mIRC channel, and Ventrilo server. I was super active on the site and as a DJ so I ended up making friends with a lot of people there.  I was quite shy and cagey about my identity because it wasn't normal to use your real name and face online yet, so I went by bunch of different screen names...I forget most of them by now but I often used Mystic Crystal, Cosmic Butterfly, and Cyberfaerie777 or Firefaerie777 (we really need to bring 2000s-era screennames back into style!). I did foolishly reveal the city I was living in and ended up with a creepy guy trying to meet up with me for months on end because he "liked my voice." Oddly enough I ended up finding him on MySpace a couple of years later by sheer coincidence and it turns out he was like 10 years older than me. Yikes.

Despite running into the occasional creep, I had a great time interacting with the other users on the site.  It's been 20 years so of course I've lost contact with most of them, even though I've spotted a few on social media.  I still talk to some of the other DJs and listeners occasionally; even met up with a few in person! We had a close-knit little group of friends. I remember making matching forum avatars and signature tags for our group that we used on every forum we joined together.

I played a ton of Japanese and European electronic music; mainly trance, breakcore, trip-hop, drum & bass, happy hardcore, and eurobeat, with a couple of techno J-pop remixes tossed in. I really loved playing the Ayumi Hamasaki remix albums, Kotoko, DJ Mystik, and Blümchen. I also had a few days where I would only play anime music. Not what you would expect from me, right? (´ ∀ ` *) I actually really liked electronic music at the time, and still do.  My first real introduction to electronic music was probably hearing Eiffel 65 on TV. I was obsessed with Need For Speed 2 and System Shock 2, which were known for having really good techno and DnB-based soundtracks.

I was constantly combing through Soulseek and obscure blogs to try and dig up interesting new stuff to play. It was relatively easy to get ahold of imported Japanese music CDs so I would buy them to rip to MP3 and then stream them on the radio or upload them to the site to share with others. I had made friends with someone on DeviantArt who made a lot of abstract 3D renders for indie electronic artists' album covers and flyers, so I learned a bit about it through him.

I was also online friends with a few cybergoths and rivetheads (in retrospect they were really just kandi kids who wore black PVC) who also got me interested in their music. And of course, I played a lot of DDR and Para Para at the arcade - there was a really cool arcade here that had a ton of Japanese import games. I skipped school a lot so I could go play at the arcade with my friends. Sorry mom!

Anyway, I didn't end up doing it for long, but it still remains a really fond memory for me. The experience introduced me to so much cool music that I otherwise wouldn't have discovered. I still love electronic music to this day - I unironically enjoy techno and you will pry my Eiffel 65 CDs from my cold, dead hands  ✧ (๑ •̀ ワ •́๑) Thank you for reading this little anecdote from my life! If people like reading them then I have lots of inconsequential little stories like this one to share.

[Current Music: Alice Deejay - The Lonely One]

I Was A Happy Victim

Have you ever seen the "Happy Victims" photography project by Kyoichi Tsuzuki? (It's all archived here if you can't find a printed copy). I was looking through it again and it got me thinking about my own relationship with consumerism as well as consumerism in lolita fashion as a whole. I touched on this in my 2021 Anti-Haul post, but I wanted to discuss it a little bit more thoroughly. I'm coming up on the one-year anniversary of when I started my minimal buy pledge, so let's start with my own story...

A photo of an h. Naoto collector from Kyoichi Tsuzuki's "Happy Victims"

"No, these Happy Victims aren’t rich; they’re decidedly on the poor side. It would hardly surprise us if they had lots of money and bought lots of clothes, but that would hardly amount to an obsession. Or if they lived in big houses with plenty of storage space, we’d never know how much they collect. But because they live in such small places, we can see exactly what they wear, what they eat, what books they read and music they listen to. Everything is out in plain view."

I haven't worn lolita nearly as often as I used to during the pandemic. I couldn't wear it to work anymore and I wasn't going out with friends, going to events, or even just going out for a walk or to do some shopping...so I only wore it on my days off at home. I felt a bit silly putting on even a simple cutsew OP and headbow just to go to the grocery store for 15 minutes, you know? I didn't do too many virtual meetups either since I found them a bit tiring. I was also going through some huge life challenges throughout the pandemic, some of which I am still struggling with, and it really shifted my perspective on things.

Over two years of living like this gave me a chance to establish a little bit of emotional distance from my wardrobe - I get extremely attached to inanimate objects, and I have a lot of fond memories bound up in all of these clothes. I spent so much money and so much time being heavily involved in the hobby that it made it hard to objectively evaluate my own behaviour until I was basically forcibly separated from it. In many ways, I was also a happy victim, until I suddenly wasn't.

Taking a bit of a step back from my special interest let me recognize some of the unhealthy habits I'd developed over the years. Without even realizing it, I'd gone from being extremely frugal, agonizing over making even the smallest of purchases, to being a bit of a spendthrift. While I never had any debt and I built up good amount of savings, I wouldn't exactly describe my spending habits as responsible, either. Sure, I could afford it, but it still wasn't prudent to spend that money when it could have been better used elsewhere; there's a lot of regret there. But that's what being a young adult is like, right? Better to make those mistakes earlier in adulthood rather than later. ( ´ ▽ ` )b

A small part of my Malice Mizer collection. I put it all into storage a few months ago.

By that time I had already decided to leave pretty much all online lolita groups as well as my local comm, leaving me blissfully unaware of what was happening in terms of new releases. I'd check in periodically to see what was new, but I didn't feel compelled to buy pieces just because I liked them. I was much better able to determine my motivations for buying - was I sad, looking for something to temporarily fill the void? Bored and needing a hit of dopamine from the thrill of a good deal? Was I filling an actual gap in my wardrobe or was I just purchasing on impulse? I actually felt much more compelled to purge things from my closet than I did to add more things to fill it with.

At that moment it truly hit me that my lolita collection was mature, for lack of a better word. I had basically everything I needed, so why add to it? There were some rare pieces I still wanted, but we all have things we want and can't have. No sense in hyperfixating on the few coveted pieces missing from my collection, which would probably cost me $2000 each in today's secondhand market. And sure, I would like to add some new colourways to my wardrobe, but did my desire to wear emerald green and grey really outweigh the expense of buying a boatload of blouses and accessories to match the 2 green and grey dresses I had?

Later I revisited my wishlist album, which I hadn't updated in well over a year...only to find that I was no longer interested in 90% of the items. My tastes didn't change, as I still liked all of those pieces...I just realized that I could appreciate them without owning them myself, and getting more dresses (when I already had over 70) was ridiculous. I ended up removing almost everything from the album. I've purchased 3 dresses and a handful of (versatile) accessories in the past year, and in that same time span I've sold close to 50 items. Before I decided to go on a minimal-buy, that's what I would buy in a month! At this point in my life, my priorities have shifted. I'd rather have the money and the closet space rather than the stuff. I just don't need it all and those items would be better served elsewhere. I'd rather have someone else enjoy and appreciate them than see them gathering dust (metaphorically, of course) in my closet.

Jane Marple collectors from Kyoichi Tsuzuki's "Happy Victims"

I am just one person, but this whole experience really got me thinking about consumerism in lolita fashion as a whole. Lolitas in general have a really unhealthy relationship with consumerism, and this relationship has only gotten worse with time. The rise of fast fashion and what I like to call "haul culture" have only accelerated the decline.

I have noticed that a lot of directionless young people throw themselves into a subculture/hobby like lolita and use it as a stand-in for their identity (because they haven't fully developed one yet) and it can end up being harmful to their mental health. The tired old jokes about eating ramen or racking up credit card debt to afford brand are a lot less funny when I think about how I've run into a lot of lolitas who have full-blown shopping addictions. Lolita being a gathering ground for unhappy people is a topic for another day, though...

Lolita culture promotes conspicuous consumption as a form of identity. I'm not going to pretend that it doesn't, or that most people who currently wear lolita love lolita for the deeply feminist countercultural roots of the fashion or whatever people are saying these days. Younger lolitas were immersed in haul culture and fast fashion from a young age and don't recognize that lolita was never intended to be consumed like that. Social media encourages trends to move as quickly as possible and slow fashions like lolita are not immune. An example would be the absolutely breakneck pace of releases, or the explosion of tiny indie brands hopping onto trend bandwagons for maaaaybe a release or two before disappearing into the ether.

This seeds jealousy, too. In order to "compete" they often feel like they need to amass an enormous, comprehensive wardrobe as quickly as possible and that people who already have them are rich assholes, spoiled, bankrolled by someone else...and I'm sure some are, but most lolitas are ordinary people who simply built their wardrobes over time. And having a cohesive wardrobe that you enjoy is much more important than having a big one. I'm happier after downsizing!

I truly wonder what the future of lolita fashion looks like now...

Until next time...

[Current Music: The Foreign Resort - Outnumbered (Bootblacks Remix)]

Coord for the Halloween Market and Plant Shopping 🎃

Whew, It's been a busy couple of weeks. September and October were wild, so I didn't have much time to write in my blog. But here I am!  I scribbled down some ideas for things I'd like to write about before the year is out. Gotta make up for lost time!

First things first - I moved into a gorgeous downtown apartment just a few days ago and the indoor lighting is so much better here. The windows are huge so they let in a ton of light. I can finally take indoor coord photos, even in winter! There's also a pretty park nearby where I can take outdoor coord photos. I can walk to just about everything I need and it's close to transit, so I can continue to get away with not buying a car. The views are lovely. The only real downside is that while it's a beautiful and upscale area...it's a beautiful and upscale area. Everything just costs more here for no good reason, so I've been going out a lot less. 

On the upside, I've gotten a bit better at cooking, and I've finally taken the opportunity to catch up on a few TV shows ٩(｡•́‿•̀｡)۶ My boyfriend is English, so he has introduced me to a whole world of TV shows that I had never heard of. While my mother raised me on British comedy shows (she spent most of her formative years living in London) our knowledge of British pop culture is circa 1980s at best, haha! My best friend also bought me two of the Vampire: The Masquerade visual novel games, Coteries of New York and Shadows of New York. It's been fun working my way through a more relaxed type of video game.

 

Beret: Moi-même-Moitié
OP: Moi-même-Moitié
Socks: Moi-même-Moitié
Accessories: Antique Beast, Moi-même-Moitié, Néant Glass
Boots: Fluevog

I just received this dress in the mail, and I can definitely see it becoming one of my favourites for more casual wear. It's super comfortable and keeps a nice shape even without a petticoat. I just didn't feel like wearing one - a recent chronic illness flare has been doing a number on my stomach - but I think it looks fine without. I wore this coord to walk down to a Halloween market that ended up being a lot smaller than expected and followed it up with an unfruitful (heh) attempt at plant shopping. Turns out that not many places sell houseplants in October - and all the plant stores were closed. Sigh. I just went to get my nails done instead. Got them cut uber short!

So aside from that...not a lot going on, I guess? I've gone to a few meetups so I have a few more coord shots to share. And I finally bought one of those Moleskine sketchbooks everyone raves about. My goal is to fill it with drawings of lolitas by the end of next year! I will post those here too.

[Current Music: Alter Bridge - Blackbird]

New manicure and perfume ✨

I've had a very stressful few weeks at work because we are extremely short-staffed, and the fall semester just started. I'm in a work-study type of arrangement so it's hard to keep up now that we don't have enough staff; my role has expanded quite a bit too. I've no idea how I held down multiple jobs and went to school full-time back in the day...phew.

I decided to treat myself a little bit (a lot) but I keep getting bonuses at work, so I figured I could do with a little retail therapy  ٩(｡•́‿•̀｡)۶ My first treat was a new pair of silver Tom Ford glasses! I usually get a couple of free pairs from work each year, and I hadn't gotten a new daily pair in a couple of years. I also went out shopping. I used to really enjoy going to the mall and shopping browsing aimlessly, despite the crowding, but now I absolutely cannot stand the crowds and noise. It makes me very anxious and short-tempered. I make my list of stores I want to hit and what I want to buy ahead of time, get in, and get out. I think I'm just all peopled out.

Headdress: Moi-même-Moitié
Blouse: Infanta

Corset: Sheglit
Skirt: Moi-même-Moitié
Socks: Moi-même-Moitié
Accessories: Moi-même-Moitié, Vivenne Westwood

Bag: Moi-même-Moitié
Shoes: Yosuke

On my list was the department store because there was a bonus points event on perfume. I remember that Mugler Angel was really popular when I was a preteen, and I remember always wanting to have a bottle. I actually remember the print advert from reading my mom's magazines in the late 90s - it was so glamorous and beautiful. My mom wore it briefly (it's not her usual style) and that smell is permanently imprinted in my memory...so I decided I should go buy some.

Aaaand...I don't know if the formula has changed since the 90s or what...but it smelled super powdery and dusty on me! It just didn't agree with my skin chemistry at all. (｡•́︿•̀｡) It was not at all like the delicious smell I remembered from childhood. I was so completely taken aback. But there was also a sample bottle of Angel Nova, which I had heard of but initially dismissed because I usually don't like fruity scents. But I gave it a chance and...wow. It's soooo good! I ended up buying the refillable bottle on the spot. I also got a replacement bottle of Mugler Alien Fusion while I was at it.

I also went looking for a few bottles of Coke. Coke is my favourite pop drink, and I'm obsessed with Coca Cola Starlight but I can't find it anywhere. It's very hard to find the novelty Coke flavours in Canada, so I was happy to get my hands on some. Even Vanilla Coke and Cherry Coke are really hard to find. If anyone finds a secret cache in Canada...let me know!

After that I went in for my nail appointment. I said goodbye to my ultra-long nails. My nails are natural and I hate the feel of extensions, so I always feel a little bit stressed when I get them cut shorter, even though I know they'll grow back eventually. I love the look but they really get in the way when I'm working - my job is so tough on my hands.

I also did a bit of lolita-related shopping...

Midori wearing the Adenophora set.

As an extra treat, I reserved the Atelier Pierrot Adenophora series! I ordered the OP and matching corset in navy; I already have an older Atelier Pierrot velvet corset in black, so I don't mind getting a navy one even if it'll match less of my clothing. I also ordered the choker in black since that will match pretty much everything I own. Lastly, I got the headdress in all three colours to match my other velveteen dresses. I'm very glad that I keep my closet's colour palette super limited!

I also pre-ordered the Pullip x Moi-même-Moitié doll! I always considered Pullip Principessa to be the unofficial Mana doll...to be honest, I like Principessa better, but this doll is just so cute. I can't wait to twin with her. Maybe I can even host a doll twinning meetup, since I know a lot of my friends bought the doll too.

That's all for now, so good night...(´｡• ᵕ •｡`) ♡

[Current Music: Traitrs - Lya]

Concert Report! ♡ Franz Ferdinand

Hello bats! A little while ago my boyfriend and I went to see Franz Ferdinand! I used to love them as a teenager but lost interest after I finished high school. I started listening to their newer material during the pandemic and got super into them again. I'm kind of sad that I never saw them live with their original lineup, but I still really like them after the lineup changes. I've also had a crush on Alex Kapranos since I was like 12 hahaaa (ꈍᴗꈍ) They're only playing their biggest hits during this tour, so the concert was a huge nostalgia bomb for me ♡ That being said, I was a little sad because it basically guaranteed some of my favourites wouldn't be played, so I'll have to wait for another tour to hear some of my underrated faves like You Could Have It So Much Better, Jacqueline, This Boy, Love and Destroy, 40'...oh well, maybe next time around  ᴵˈᵐ ᵒᵏ(ᵕ̣̣̣ ͜ ᵕ̣̣̣ ˶ )

The concert was scheduled on my day off, so I finally got to wear clothes that rarely see the light of day because they're not work-appropriate. I wore a Nina Hagen shirt from Stigmata, my trusty Moitié beret, a long leather skirt with a slit, Docs, and this ridiculous vinyl crucifix choker. I hadn't worn that choker in so long that it was literally gathering dust...

We loaded up on the dinner of champions (deep dish pizza and beer) and headed over to the concert hall. They were super strict about security - I got patted down and had to go through a metal detector. We ate dinner a bit slower than expected so we got there just as the opening act was saying goodbye -thankfully, we still managed to get a good spot! We were able to stand on an elevated platform behind the accessible seating and VIP area, which was pretty close to the stage and gave us a really clear view over people's heads. I'm so used to being completely body-blocked by taller people so it was amazing just being able to see for once!! ╰(*´︶`*)╯

Anyway, after we found our spot, Franz Ferdinand started right on time. I didn't cheat and read setlists beforehand, so I wasn't sure exactly what to expect. They opened up with No You Girls and Darts of Pleasure. They also performed Walk Away, one of my favourite FF songs, but I didn't like this particular rendition very much...felt a little bit low-energy for such an upbeat and dancy selection of songs. But everything else was great! I think I enjoyed their performance of Michael the most. It always throws me hearing the NSFW version of the lyrics haha. It was probably the most energetic performance of the evening - as it should be, since that song is super hype.

Overall the concert was tons of fun! I think that this is one of the rare few bands that sounds way better live than on recording. They're super energetic and interacted with the audience a lot, with lots of sing-along parts. The whole audience was dancing, jumping, and clapping along. To be honest, I was  bit too full of pizza to feel like dancing much, haha! Alex's voice still sounds really good, even on the high notes, and I wasn't expecting him to be dancing and jumping around as much as he did when he was younger but I was pleasantly surprised. Julian is very fun to watch too.

Thankfully they also ended on time, so we managed to get home at a decent hour to get some much-needed sleep. Gone are the days of staying out until 3am on a work night with no consequences...  ٩(ˊ〇ˋ*) و That being said, my boyfriend ended up getting sick afterwards even though we both had our fourth booster shots a few weeks ago. He's was feeling very poorly but is on the mend and I somehow avoided it altogether, so I consider ourselves quite lucky...

I'm going to several more shows in the next couple of months, so I'll be back soon with another concert report! ♡

[Current Music: Holygram - Odd Neighbourhood]

Visiting the World of Barbie Exhibit ♡

Hello bats! A few weeks ago I visited the new World of Barbie exhibit for a friend's birthday. The exhibit featured a variety of life-sized interactive rooms and displays. It was really just a series of giant Instagrammable backdrops, with some Barbie history sprinkled in - I didn't mind, though, since it was really well done! Even though I collect dolls, I was never interested in collecting Barbie stuff past childhood...but there were a ton of adult fans there as well as kids who were decked out in all pink or Barbie merch. It was cute seeing how many people dressed up in glam outfits to visit the exhibit!

I have to admit, though...Barbie: Life in the Dreamhouse is pretty great. (´ ∀ ` *)

Hat: Offbrand
OP: Atelier Boz
Socks: Moi-même-Moitié
Accessories: Moi-même-Moitié
Bag: Moi-même-Moitié
Shoes: Bodyline

I was feeling a bit lazy and the weather was blazing hot and stormy, so I wore a really simple coord with my Carol OP and a hat, and put my hair into big twists. My hair has finally grown long enough for twintails and braids again! I liked having it cut super short, but it wasn't very versatile. I don't think I'll cut it that short again even though it was super liberating. The exhibit ended up being really crowded so I'm glad I didn't go too big and fancy with my coord.

It took us about an hour or so to visit each room in the exhibit. My favourite room was the history of Barbie room, which was full of displays of vintage Barbie toys. It even featured a life-sized replica of the original 1960s dollhouse next to a vintage one in mint condition! I see them pop up on Ebay sometimes, but they're almost always damaged.

 

The TV was playing a looped video of a Barbie advert from the 1960s or early 1970s.

There was also display case filled with different Barbie cars. This part was super nostalgic for me as I was very interested in cars and auto racing as a child, so I had a lot of Barbie cars! ♡  I vividly remember playing with the 1980s Corvettes as a kid - the pink chrome one and the aqua one in the photo. I hadn't thought about these toys in decades, but seeing them brought me right back. I think I had the 1990s pink Corvette too, now that I think about it.

There was also a photo op area where you could pose inside little dioramas meant to look like Barbie boxes.

My friend (the birthday girl ♡) loves mermaids, unicorns, and fairies so this box was perfect for her!

 

This box was a perfect match with my other friend's Crystal Dream Carnival print!

I just liked the colours in the tennis-themed box haha („• ᴗ •„)

Some other highlights included a life-sized Barbie camper van with seating areas (I had one of those too!), a spaceship, a walk-in closet and dressing room, a kitchen with cute vintage appliances, and a powder room. Everything was impressively detailed - I was impressed!

Afterwards, we had fluffy Japanese pancakes for lunch! I had strawberry pancakes with yuzu iced tea. I suppose that's more of a dessert than a lunch, but who's keeping score?

That's all for now ♡

[Current Music: Children on Stun - Sidelined]

Antique Beast Mini-Haul

I've been trying to add purple and red accessories to my wardrobe, so I ordered the Layla Headdress, Caym Headdress, and Sacrifice Choker in April. There are bunch of other things I wanted to order at the same time, but I didn't want to go overboard since April is income tax season  (◞ ‸ ◟ㆀ) I know that she'll reopen the shop in a few months but I'm impatient haha. I already know what I'm going to buy next! Anyway, I've never seen a review or any close-up photos of these items, so I thought I'd do a quick post about my haul.

† Layla Headdress †

The black version of this  headdress has been on my wishlist for a very long time, but I decided to order the purple version instead. I'm very glad I did! It's more colourful than it looks in the stock photos. The flowers are actually a mixture of black, grey, and dark purple. I also love the cute little berries! I have a floral tattoo with tiny berries on my arm, so I match ( ˊᵕˋ ) I wish there were more gothic prints and accessories that featured fruits...

† Caym Headdress †

This headdress is so beautifully detailed! I love feathers so I had to buy this one. The colouring on the feathers is so subtle and pretty too - I really like the stripes and ombre effect. The only thing I don't like is that it's pretty flat so I have to wear it with my hair straightened or put up, because it just disappeared into my curls when I wore it with my hair down.

† Sacrifice Choker †

Lastly, I bought a new choker since I have very few red accessories. You can never go wrong with rolled roses and velvet ♡ I really like the black/red shimmery ribbon and the crystal blood drip details are so cute, too! I'm planning on wearing this in  a red velveteen blood/vampire-themed coord for Halloween. I might order the matching headdress if the shop opens up in time.

Anyway, that's all for now! I have another Antique Beast order lined up so I'll share photos as soon as it arrives ♡

[Current Music: The Birthday Massacre - Red Stars]

45 Lolita Questions

 

Hello bats! This month my friend decided to resurrect this ancient post and it's been making the rounds in our blogging circle. I have actually had the original 100-question version just chilling in my drafts since 2018. It's been like 90% complete for ages but I never got around to finishing it. Maybe someday...

Anyway, let's get to the questions!

1. Please tell us your Hand Name (name that’s used ONLY in internet.) and hometown.

Adenophora. My home planet is located deep in the Andromeda Galaxy ♡ but I currently reside on Earth.

2. About how long is your history as a Lolita?
About 8 1⁄2 years or so, but I'm not really sure to be honest.

3. What first motivated you to do Lolita fashion?

I discovered Malice Mizer while browsing goth websites and LiveJournal. I became a big fan of Mana in particular and looking for information about him led me to EGL on LiveJournal. I realized that I could dress like that if I wanted to...and the rest is history.

4. After knowing Lolita fashion, have you had any time-gap or resistance till you actually started to be Lolita?
I first discovered lolita fashion around 2004; I bought a few accessories like headbows and jewellery and tried to match them with "loliable" pieces just like every other broke teenager in the mid-2000s. I didn't consider myself a lolita proper until I bought my first real main piece many years later.
 

5. Please define your Lolita style as much as possible. (eg. gothic Lolita, sweet Lolita, white Lolita…. Etc).
Gothic lolita only ♡ I typically wear kuro/shiro and layer lots of different textures together, but sometimes I'll wear accent colours or colourful main pieces. Most of the time I wear pretty simple coords, but I like both the simple Moi-même-Moitié/Atelier Boz style of gothic and the frilly Atelier Pierrot/Alice and the Pirates style. . I also like to mix lolita with trad goth/punk/rivethead elements since I go to a lot of goth clubs, concerts, etc.

 

6. About how many Lolita friends do you have?
Close friends? Maybe 8. I have a lot of more casual lolita friends locally and online.
 

7. What is the best thing about doing Lolita?
Being able to look and feel fancy and decadent even when doing mundane things like shopping or hanging out with friends.
 

8. Conversely, what's the worst thing?
Dealing with the constant barrage of creeps attempting to infiltrate lolita spaces.
 

9. Which Lolita Brands do you like?
Moi-même-Moitié, Atelier Boz, Atelier Pierrot, Alice and the Pirates, Sheglit, Victorian Maiden, and Antique Beast.
 

10.  What was the first Lolita item that you’ve owned?
A grey Moitié skirt with raschel lace trim and a black flocked print.
 

11.  What is the “must have!” Lolita item?
For gothic lolitas, I think it's the original Moitié bat handbag. It's iconic, cute, versatile, and has lots of storage space and pockets!
 

12.  Do you wear drawers?
Yes, but I prefer bicycle shorts or boxer shorts.
 

13.  Do you have any favourite Japanese music?
I discovered lolita fashion through visual kei, even though I don't listen to it a lot anymore. I still really like Malice Mizer, G-Schmitt, Moi Dix Mois, Buck-Tick, Versailles, Lareine, Unlucky Morpheus, and GPKISM...I could probably go on listing bands forever so I'll leave it there for now!
 

14.  Where do you particularly visit as Lolita?
There are a few restaurants and tea houses that I visit pretty regularly. I also like to go to a nearby luxury shopping district.
 

15. About how many times per week do you dress as Lolita?
These days, once at best...
 

16.  Please tell us about one embarrassing episode from the time when you were just beginning Lolita.
I'm allergic to wasps. One time I was in the park and wasps got tangled up in my hair corsage...I was so scared of being stung that I yanked my whole wig off and ran away. ( ´ ▽ ` )b
 

17.  What's hairstyle and color that you think Lolita would suit the most?
Long, jet black hime cut. It looks cute no matter what style you wear!
 

18.  Have you ever thought of stopping Lolita? The reason?
Not in a serious way, but sometimes I think about how much profit I would make by selling off my entire wardrobe. I don't think I have many particularly rare or special pieces in my wardrobe, but Moitié was relatively cheap when I started collecting it nearly a decade ago.

19.  Please tell us your heart's bible as a Lolita. (anything like a book, magazine, CD, idol...)
Malice Mizer's album Bara No Seidou.
 

20.  Do you own a doll? Tell us your feelings about her intensely! 

 

 

I have so many dolls!! Even though I was a very tomboyish child, I always adored dolls, and I still do as an adult. I wish I owned a fancy BJD, but I'm happy with my Pullips and Blythes. I also collect Monster High and Novi Stars dolls. This is a pretty old picture of my doll shelf - I've got way more now.

21.  What kind of make-up do you wear when you wear Lolita clothes?
The same makeup I normally wear every day, I guess? I normally wear winged eyeliner, colourful eyeshadow, fake lashes, and sometimes translucent powder if I'm looking oily. The only real difference that I change is that I don't usually wear black lipstick with lolita and just stick with red lipstick or lip gloss.
 

22.  Have you ever secretly changed clothes in a train station bathroom on Lolita day-out?
Nope. Thankfully I don't have to travel very far for meets.
 

23. Are you composed when doing Lolita all by yourself? 

When I was a new lolita I would get pretty anxious when alone out in public, but now I'm fine.
 

24.  How much do you spend in your Lolita clothes & accessory monthly?
Lately, $0. I have been on a low-buy for over a year. I used to spend maybe $400/month.
 

25.  What is the most expensive Lolita thing you've bought so far? How much was it?
My black x blue Iron Gate JSK was about ¥85,000. Seems like a steal compared to current prices -  about a week ago I was bidding on the same JSK in white and it ended up going for about $1500.
 

26.  So far about how much has the expense been for Lolita goods?
Too much...
 

27.  Lolita outfit really costs money. How do you raise money to cover the cost of Lolita?
I have a full time job ( ´ ▽ ` )b As a broke teenager lolita seemed impossibly expensive to me, but at this point in my life it's it's very affordable for me.
 

28.  Have you ever bought from an online store? If so, please tell us its good and bad points and some advice for the future. If not, please tell us why not.
This questionnaire is really showing it's age (early 2000s?) haha! Secondhand shopping is always a bit of a gamble no matter what, but it feels safer buying from secondhand shops like Wunderwelt and Closet Child than it does to buy directly from a person. Always ask for more proof photos if you're suspicious of anything!
 

29.  Even if you sort of want to keep it a secret, please clandestinely tell us about a private manufacturer that is the best.
I don't have that kind of insider knowledge haha!
 

30.  Is there a brand and/or an item that you think, "I could never get it! But I unreasonably want it!"?
Not really! I have most of my dream pieces already, and the few that I don't own, my friends own. We kind of have a communal closet going so I don't feel that obsessed with having to own every single piece that I want. 

31.  What do you think about people who only do Lolita at music-lives or cosplay?
To be honest, I used to think they were lame. Now that I'm older I recognize that it's okay to just dabble in a hobby instead of pursuing it full-tilt, and not everyone has the time/energy/money/etc to be a full-time lolita. There's absolutely nothing wrong with being a weekend warrior.
 

32.   From what age to what age is it acceptable to do Lolita? Do you think that there's a state in which someone must graduate from Lolita? (you can answer as ‘never graduate’)
I don't think age matters at all. You should only graduate from lolita when you no longer enjoy it. It's fine to move on when you personally feel like you've outgrown something, but never let other people dictate that for you.
 

33.  Is there a Lolita fashion or behavior that you think "I don't want Lolitas to do this!" about?
I feel like I have this exact reaction to every single lolita I've seen on Tiktok, so...that.
 

34.  Is there something you think "Lolita has to be this way!" about?
Not really...as long as the basic ingredients are there, I'm pretty flexible. I like experimental coordinates, unconventional looks, and mixing lolita with other things. But I think a lot of people get this wrong when they try to put their own spin on lolita to the point that the basic elements are missing or obscured, and it doesn't look like lolita anymore.
 

35.  While doing Lolita, has something changed from earlier than you did Lolita?
Honestly, I put in less effort now. I prefer to wear simpler and more comfortable coords now.
 

36. Do you go to school/work as Lolita?
I went to school in lolita when I was in university. Sometimes I wear toned-down or casual coords at work if I want to look nice.
 

37.  Do you wear Lolita clothes as casual wear?
Yes, but less frequently than I used to.
 

38. Do you have a boyfriend (or husband)? Do you understand each other? (I think she meant “Does he understand you (as lolita)?”)
Yes and yes!
 

39. What do the people around you think of your doing Lolita? Do they accept it?
They don't mind, and if they did I wouldn't keep them around.
 

40.  What kind of Lolita is who has impressed you the most up until now?
A lot of my lolita friends sell lolita clothing and accessories that they've designed and made themselves. I really admire their creativity and their dedication to the hobby.
 

41.  Have you ever made your own Lolita clothing or/and accessories? If so, what was the best item that you’ve made?
I have but they're not very good so I'm not going to show them haha. I'm still learning to sew.
 

42.  If you have an ideal Lolita outfit or coordination, please tell us.

To me the ideal gothic lolita coordinate is the OG black x white look. You can't go wrong with a solid black JSK, a white blouse, white OTKs, and chunky black shoes. I don't even wear this combo much myself, but it's iconic and striking.
 

43.  Is there a motif that you think “this is a simple of Lolita”?
Prints with crosses and roses.
 

44. Would you want to dress your children as Lolita?
I don't want children, but if I did, I wouldn't want them to wear lolita unless they actually liked it. It's too fussy for small children.
 

45.  What's your image of the ideal Lolita?

 

 

[Current Music: Vandal Moon - Suicidal City Girl]

Concert Report ♡ Lebanon Hanover, Wingtips, and Traitrs

Hello bats! Last night I went out to see Lebanon Hanover, Wingtips, and Traitrs. It was my first time going to a concert since early 2020, before all of the covid lockdowns took effect. I went to work first so I couldn't go too crazy with my outfit. wore my Moitié beret, denim patch jacket and a Strawberry Switchblade shirt that I kinda belted into a dress. I got the shirt from a punk guy from Japan who hand screenprints all sorts of obscure band logos onto old shirts and sells them.

It was nice outside so I ate my dinner in the park. I had a smash burger from my favourite burger restaurant and Iron Goddess milk tea with tapioca. The local colour in the park gets sort of weird in the evenings...I was sat next to a guy wearing a plastic green St. Patrick's Day hat and got awkwardly hit on no less than 3 times by passerby in the 15 minutes it took me to eat. There was also a big dude rapping aggressively at the small children in the playground for some reason.

I also got my nails done! I got two different colours of cateye nail polish with chains and studs ♡

I got to the venue early, so after I raided the merch tables - I bought a shirt for each band, a shirt for my friend, a canvas bag, and an enamel pin - I set up camp in a nice spot near the front but off to the side of the pit. The playlist running during the bands' setup time was so good! I knew most of the songs since they were standard goth night fare like Skinny Puppy, Joy Division, Nitzer Ebb, etc. but I wish they published a list somewhere, haha.

It wasn't overly crowded but I've always hated having people in my personal space and even moreso after covid. I wear earplugs to help with the potential sensory overload of having so many people talking nearby. I also wore my N95 since I'd been wearing it at work anyway...not sure if that really matters when people are screaming all around you, though. There was one very drunk, very loud woman near me who wouldn't stop shouting directly into my ear that covid was fake, she never got sick even though she never wore a mask or got vaccinated, sheeple, Trudeau sucks blah blah blah...like jesus lady, quit killing the vibe, nobody cares!

Traitrs went up first and got the crowd super hyped up and dancing. They sound so good live! Just as good as their recordings, even the vocals. I was really happy that they played my two favourite songs, The Lovely Wounded and Thin Flesh. Wingtips went up next and they were a little more chilled out at first and the crowd calmed down a little, but their last couple of songs were more danceable and brought the energy back up again. I haven't listened to a ton of Wingtips lately so I wasn't familiar with everything that they played but I still had a ton of fun dancing. Minimalistic sounded really good live! It felt a bit more intense and aggressive than the album version. 

Lebanon Hanover went up last after a bit of a wait. I was pretty exhausted by this point but still had a little energy to dance. Everyone got super excited when they started playing Gallowdance (of course) and when they started to dance on stage. Larissa is just so, so cool and elegant. I'm really happy I finally got to see them live!!

Man, how the hell did I do this all the time as a uni student? I'd have like 10 hours of class, work a half shift at my shitty job, rush home to do my makeup, and then haul ass to the club to dance or watch a show...then crawl into bed at 2AM and wake up for 6AM. Or simply pull an all-nighter to do my homework or play video games...and suffer no ill effects the next morning. To this day, I've never experienced a hangover.

Oh, to be young and irresponsible again ( ´ ▽ ` )b

Anyway I headed home and just chilled a bit before going to bed. I was super zonked out but I got a notification on my phone that the new Then Comes Silence album, Hunger, had been released!! I had to listen to it before going to sleep. It's solid. I'm not sure if I feel like writing up a whole album review but...just go listen to it. I love how each album sounds distinct, but you can always tell that it's TCS. My favourite tracks are Rise to the Bait, Tickets to Funerals, and Blood Runs Cold.

, it was a great way to start off a long weekend. The past few weeks of work have been pretty rough so  I really needed a break.I don't have too many plans for the weekend; I'm going to finish importing all of my lolita wardrobe into Notion, do some longboarding, and go out with one of my friends for a Sunday brunch! I'm also going to sign up with a local yoga studio so I can learn to relax a little bit haha...

I'm also going to play lots of Final Fantasy XIV. I bought the game in 2012 but never really played it. One of my good friends recommended I try it again and I fell in love with it. I swear this game is the thin thread holding my sanity together right now haha ( ˊᵕˋ )♡ I'm playing an Black Mage but I'm also levelling up my Bard and Dragoon jobs at the same time. I am super excited to unlock Red Mage - they were always my favourite job in the Final Fantasy games.

I used to be a hardcore MMO player - mainly Lineage 2 and Ragnarok Online in the past, and TERA Online in more recent years - but now that I'm working longer hours I really like how laid-back FFXIV is. I'm not super interested in running statics and grinding endlessly to craft best-in-slot stuff anymore. The storyline is solid, and it's fun to just chill and relax ingame with my friends. There's so much fun stuff to do that I don't feel pressured to speedrun the main storyline so get to the endgame. Anyway, I'm playing on Cactuar if anyone wants to play together!

[Current Music: VR SEX - End Vision]